What you need to know when trying to find an EMDR Therapist Near You
🚩 Red Flag 1: The EMDR therapist can’t regulate their own emotions
Trauma therapy, including EMDR therapy, IS intense! And therapists are human, too. BUT therapists are responsible for doing their own healing work so their unresolved stuff does not get taken out on their clients. A fantastic therapist knows how to regulate their own emotions so they can help you co-regulate during those moments of intensity, which leads to you learning how to self-regulate outside of the session. Below are 4 Red Flags to look for when trying to find an EMDR Therapist Near You.
🚩 Red Flag 2: The EMDR therapist doesn’t hold you accountable
(gives in to their own people pleasing / fawning responses - more concerned with you liking them than helping you) Calling you out is one of the ways that we, as therapists, make sure we’re not enabling you. After all, we’re helping you achieve the goals that you want us to help you with.
🚩 Red Flag 3: The counselor doesn’t model healthy boundaries. Healthy boundaries include, but not limited to:
📆 Upholding cancellation policies
⏰ Holding time boundaries for session- starts on time, ends on time, does not cancel ALL the time or constantly rearrange your scheduled time.
📲 Is constantly available outside of session. Constant outside of session contact, in general, is not healthy, because again, it fosters codependence and inhibits your own ability to make the changes necessary to help you achieve your treatment goals.
🚩 Red Flag 4: The EMDR therapist is working harder than you are OR not working at all.
Therapy is an investment of time and energy. There should a mutual contribution to your session. Many therapists seek supervision and consultation outside of sessions to make sure they’re doing the best they can to help you. But therapists should also be supporting you to do your own work, too (which goes back to the accountability from before)
💭 Please keep in mind, there are exceptions to everything I just said, life is certainly not black and white, and neither is therapy. If you have any concerns with your current therapist, please communicate with them about it!
About the Author
Dana Carretta-Stein is a licensed mental health counselor and owner of Peaceful Living Mental Health Counseling, a trauma informed counseling practice in Scarsdale, NY. Dana is passionate about the importance of trauma informed care and the effect it has on emotional, physical and mental well-being. She loves to learn about and educate others on compassionate, evidence-based, and effective counseling interventions to help individuals of all ages achieve fulfilling relationships and optimal wellness.
Dana is a specialist and avid enthusiast of EMDR Therapy, one of the most effective evidenced based treatments for trauma, and uses it regularly in her practice. As an EMDRIA Approved Consultant, she provides consultation to other EMDR therapists to help them enhance their learning, confidence and skills as an EMDR Therapist.
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